CHEESEBURGERS IN PARADISE

Salute Your Shorts

Season 1 (1991)

When I think of summer camp, I immediately think of Salute Your Shorts.  While re-watching just the first scene of “Cheeseburgers in Paradise” I was immediately struck by how my childhood favorite, Salute Your Shorts, and Orange Is the New Black, one of my current TV favorites, are exactly the same show.  The opening scene of this episode has the red-haired bully Budnick dealing contraband food disguised as everyday objects.  Orange Is the New Black has the character of Red, who deals in contraband food.  Counselor Ug is just like the prison guard Pornstache.  Both shows deal with confinement, rule-breaking, bullies, bad cafeteria food—this episode of Salute Your Shorts even has a prison break of sorts!  The list of similarities is endless..

First, a programming note: the version of this episode that I have, purchased from iTunes (also on Amazon), is titled "Cheeseburgers in Paradise."  However online it's widely called "Donkeylips and Sponge Weigh In."  I can't verify which once is the correct title, but both work well enough.

Now, a warning: watching this particular episode of Salute Your Shorts will make you hungry.  It’s all about food: good food, bad food, and the repercussions of food on all of our lives.  In this episode campers Sponge and Donkeylips are both trying to enter a wrestling competition, the winner of which gets a lobster dinner at a fancy restaurant (because kids go crazy for lobster!).  Sponge is underweight and Donkeylips overweight, so resident jock Telly serves as their trainer, having them respectively bulk up on bananas and run laps.  As a kid I was the size of wispy Sponge—sadly as an adult I find myself relating to Donkeylips.  Times sure have changed-- I’m going to the gym when I finish writing this post!

Meanwhile the other campers, disgusted by the camp’s “Bratwurst Surprise,” are plotting to order food from a local hamburger joint.  Budnick eventually forces Sponge and Donkeylips to go and buy the contraband food, with Ug hot on their trail.  Despite a series of mishaps they managed to smuggle the food into camp and everyone devours it before Ug discovers them.  However when it comes time for their final weigh-in, both boys have the food wrappers stuffed under their clothes and they can’t shed the extra weight without busting everyone.  Don’t worry; it has a happy ending, as they both manage to meet their weight goals even with the burger wrappers stuffed down their sweatshirts.

This episode is surprisingly poignant, as both Sponge and Donkeylips bond over being bullied about their size.  The friendship that grows between them is really sweet and genuine, especially for Donkeylips, who only wants to win a wrestling trophy to impress his neglectful parents.  Even Ug, normally the antagonist, is rather nice and supportive in this episode, as he’s rooting for the boys to make their goals.

And then there’s the food!  Sponge and Donkeylips sneak off to a place that’s called “The Tummy Pleaser.”  For such a small place in the middle of the woods, it has an impressively large menu: burgers, tuna salad, pies, tacos, tamales, and frozen yogurt are all seen or advertised.  The scene in which the kids wolf down their burgers will have you hearing the siren song of McDonald’s.  Even better, the music that plays during the eating montage is the same music heard in beloved TV special The Halloween That Almost Wasn’t!  One scene has kids eating hamburgers and the other a witch flying across the night sky, but the score is one and the same.  This type of TV synergy is what I live for!

Apparently I'm not the only one with fond memories of this episode, because someone created this awesome fan art of Donkeylips carting Sponge to The Tummy Pleaser in a wheelbarrow:

Camp Activities: Wrestling, Running the Mile, Eating

Camp Quotient: It’s pretty darn campy, earning a 4.

See It, Skip It, Own It?

I think I’ve effectively established that Salute Your Shorts is awesome.  Sadly only about half of the series is available for purchase via download. We need a full DVD release!